~~My Texas Strangler~~

My daddy used to always tell me that I was always letting my mouth get my ass in trouble. Once again he was right.

A bunch of co-workers bought tickets to the Cowboy game. We had people coming in from all over so we planned to tailgating. We had tables, plenty of food, tequila, and anything else you wanted. We planned on doing it big. We all met at the office and rode a caravan to the stadium. We arrived at the stadium about 8:00 to get a good spot. It was misty rain in the air but it was expected so every one was bundled up. Since it was kinda cold that morning we had a nice hearty breakfast that consisted of sausage and tequila. We had so much food. There were 4 grills going at the same time. It didn't take us long to warm up there was just as much alcohol as there was food. We were having a hee haw good time. There were some big lumber jack white boys that came in for the game from Lubbock. They were hilarious. They were loud and big, hell that JC was juuuuuuust right. More about him later.

A friend of my co-worker Kevin was there. Just a regular ass Dallas Black man. Did I mention that he had a signature South Dallas gold tooth? As much as I would like to deny it or leave this part out, all of my stories are true to the best of my recollection. When Kevin introduced me to James and he smiled I noticed the toof. He was a big Cowboy fan and had on the hat and jersey to prove it. He was cute except for that got damned tooth. I wasn't interested in him at all. He was a little too country for me. He was shorter then I prefer but dressed and smelled nice all the same.

We all had to trek about a mile to the stadium it was one hell of a walk. We were all nice and drunk. That seemed like we walked the quickest mile ever. We were all laughing and joking the whole way. It seemed like everyone on this walk was good and drunk. Some people walked by drinking and smoking weed. It was great! Most of the group was drinking right up to the gates. We found out nose bleed seats right before kick off. We were one rowdy drunk bunch. I made sure that I sat next to JC he was one funny lumber jack! This dude was non-stop laughs. He pissed off a man that was sitting in front of us because he kept cussing. It was "Did you see that mother fucker?" and "That was some bullshit!" Well that man in front of us kept looking back at JC. I was laughing uncontrollably because I could tell that this man was about to lose it. I have a problem laughing at the most inappropriate times. I told JC that that man was getting pissed. He didn't give a rats ass on a glue trap that that man was getting upset. He just kept getting louder. So finally the man told him that he needed to stop all of that cussing that him and his family didn't appreciate it. There I go again with the giggling, It was damn near half time at that point. So the next thing that JC hollers was.

"Did you see that mother tucker?"

I thought that I was about to die! The man whipped his head around and JC just shrugged, and said that he didn't cuss. Well he didn't. I laughed so hard I damn near peed on myself. I might have a little bit. (lol) He had another as well. "That was some bullshot" Every time he shouted some made up cuss word I fell out!

I don't even remember who won. I am guessing that the cowboys did because we ended up in the Cowboy Corral. The Corral is where you get to hang out after the game and drink some more. Just what we needed right? We were all pretty much out of control. I was talking shit to Kevin's friend James. I seem to do that pretty well. Kevin told me to ask James what his nick name was. So I ask him and he gives me another one of those gold toof smiles. He asks me if I really wanted to know. Kevin is nudging me snickering "a he he he". I told him yes I wanted to know or I wouldn't have asked. He tells me Peter.

"OK,um. What the hell is funny about that?"

Kevin says ask him to tell you the rest. I am drunk and done playing their silly ass game. So I tell James just to tell me or don't I couldn't give a shit.

James was like "yeah, I like for my women to talk shit."

I rolled my eyes. He told me that his friends called him Peter because he was the Pussy eater. OK, great you are just another man that eats pussy. He went on and on about how good he was and that he would like to show me. I am not from the show me state but I can pretend. I am not sure how long after this I decided to take him home but it was probably right after we got thrown out of the Corral for something that JC did. That was one wild and crazy guy! I can't remember what he did to get us kicked out though I was drink remember?

James and I were going to sneak to my place for what I planned to be a quickie. The rest of the group was going to a sports bar to watch the rest of the 2nd games. Before we left for my house James asked me if I had ever heard of a man by the name of Kem. I told him that no I hadn't so he went to Kevin's truck to get the CD. When we get to my apartment I guess he is trying to set a "mood" so he tells me to put in the CD and put it on number on 6 (When Love Calls-Kemistry). I love Kem don't get me wrong, but this dude has forever soiled this song. I cannot hear this song to this day without getting a sick feeling in my stomach. I will put my hand on a stack of bibles and attest that what I am about tell you know is God honest truth. When the music starts he asks me to dance with him. I get up and we start to dance. The music is good. He is grinding on me but I am horny right now. That alcohol had my kitty thumping. So it's cool right? Everything is all good. He sits me down in my leather rocking chair when it happens. He starts dancing for me. Like a chocolate ass Chippendale! I hate male strippers! There is something wrong about a man that can prance around a club for a dollar. I will save that rant for another time. Any way...this man is dancing around and removing his clothes all through my house. I ask him to please stop. I didn't want to hurt his feeling with what I am sure is a look of disgust on my face. He says to me that this was his first time ever doing something like this. I was thinking to myself, why in the hell is he using me as a Guinea pig? I was embarrassed for him really. I was not feeling this shit one bit! Matter of fact I had made a deal with myself. I had decided that if he took off his pants and he had on some bikini drawls that was going to be the deal breaker. He was going to have to get his black ass the fuck outta my house!! He didn't have on bikini briefs, or tightie whiteys on. Thank goodness for him. Because I shit you not, if he did? He was getting his black ass outta my apartment!

He undresses me and sits me back down on the rocking chair and goes to work. Not only does this chair rock it also reclines and spins. I suggest if you don't have one get one! You can get into all kind of trouble in that chair! He had me contorted in that chair with my boots hooked over the back of the chair and my ass in the air going to work. I am flexible dammit! Don't let the chubbiness fool you. I will be a reference for him if anyone ever questions his nick name of Peter...yes ma'am I will! Well this rendezvous of ours took longer then expected and I had to drive his ass all the way home. Everyone had decided not to go to the sports bar. I guess getting thrown out of one bar was good enough for one day. It was on the trip home that he told me that he was married but separated. OPPS! I have got to remember to ask that question! Married but separated is still that, married. If you have a marriage license and no divorce decree you are married...period. I blame myself as much as I blame him I should have asked but didn't. You live and learn. I was done with him at that point...doomp doomp doomp another one bites the dust.

It was months later that I found out that James finally was divorced. James wanted Kevin to tell me and see if he could get my number. I agreed and Kevin game him my number. I don't remember now how long it took for us to connect again. This particular time was probably our second or third get together after we reconnected. But now you are going to find out his new nickname and the reason for the title.

I met him at his house for a late night creep. I sat my purse and down in the kitchen. I am not sure that we got started right after hello. He lifted me up on the kitchen counter pulled up mu skirt and started eating my pussy. You would think that Miss Kitty is steak flavored the way these dudes like tasting me. I don't mind a bit I enjoy feeding the needy. He doesn't stop feasting on me until he makes me cum. Right there on the counter where I am sure he makes his meals. He helps me off the counter thankfully because my knees almost gave out. Ol boy's mouth was going platinum!! He turns me around and lifts up one knee on the counter and is letting me have it! My head is keeps bumping the cabinet, but I am not about to ask him to stop. It could have gave me a concussion for all I cared at the moment. I am making so much noise it was a good thing he lived in a house. My nosey ass neighbors would have called the police. We move into the bedroom and he is fucking me doggie style.

He whispers in my ear "do you like it rough?"

I hate trying to answer questions when I am having sex! I some how scream out yes in between my moans. When out of no where this mother fucka has me in some kind of a wrestling mixed marital arts submission head lock. Now at first I am thinking OK this shit is weird but he is fucking the shit out of me! Whatever he is doing is working. Then his grip gets tighter. I try and wiggle around because it is getting kind of hard to breath. That doesn't work, his grip gets even tighter. Now the shit is scary because it gets even tighter and now I cannot breath! He has me on all fours. I try and used one of my hands to tap out. I am not into this sadomasochistic bullshit. I mean hello I said I liked it rough? I was thinking some ass slapping, throwing me on the bed, and maybe some hair pulling. Not some erotic asphyxiation bullshit. Aren't you supposed to have a safe word and shit? The tap out doesn't work. I cannot speak because I cannot breath! I was gasping for air. This bastard is hunching a hundred pumps a minute. When I reached up to tap his forearm that is now literally choking the life out of me my other arms gives and the pillow that he used to prop my ass in the air is further blocking any chance of gasping for air. My face is in the pillow and his ass now has all of his weight on me. Right when I thought that I was about to black out or die he cums and lets go of my neck. F I N A L L Y !! I can breath! I was PISSED. The first thing that I said when I was able to catch my breath is,

"Nigga, are you trying to kill me!?!?"

He was like, "What are you talking about? I thought you liked it rough?"

"Rough I like. I couldn't breath asshole!"

He is laying there next to me breathing hard and shit. I should have karate chopped this bastard in the Adams apple. I get up and go through the house picking up my clothes n shit that are thrown throughout the house. I am pissed and stomping around because the only thing in my mind is getting my black ass the hell out of there. He is following me around the house as I am picking up my shit begging me to stay the night. Talking about how late it was and how far of a drive I had. It didn't matter how long I had to drive! I was getting the fuck out of his house, and going home. He started to apologize and told me that he thought that I like it. Yeah I liked it until I couldn't breath. He was like you didn't say anything.

"Well no shit!? I didn't say anything because I couldn't breath!"

He is now known to all my friends as James the Choker. I have ran into him several times after this and even had sex with him a couple of times after. It took a year or so before we hooked up after this happened. He really was sorry. At the time it was beside the point. All I knew that this was just another instance of my mouth getting my ass in trouble. Rough my black ass!!

~The End~